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Parenting

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There are a lot of forces working against us as parents today. There is peer influence, poor examples of family life in the homes of our kids’ friends, movies, television, video games, social media, the internet, advertising, and the instant gratification that comes from the ability to communicate with anyone at any time via texting. The decline in the moral fiber of our society further encourages our kids to be self-centered, self-indulgent, and focused on what they can get or take from others, rather than what they can offer or give to others.
 
The truth is - BEING A PARENT IS HARD WORK. And being a good parent is A LOT of hard work. Effective parenting requires placing the needs of others before your own, unwavering commitment, perseverance, and teamwork—which, often times, is NOT a given between the parents. Our parenting efforts often go unacknowledged and unappreciated, and much of the time, can feel like an absolutely thankless job.
 
You know your child best. But resistance and animosity from your child can cloud your objectivity, and limit your ability to sort out the appropriate course of action as a parent. Perspective and guidance from an experienced counselor can go a long way toward improving those skills we all thought would come naturally when we were blessed with a child in our lives.
Counseling Insights and Articles About Parenting:
Changing Your Parenting Blueprint, by Kathy Cap
Encourage A Child Today
, by Wendy Warner
Humble Listening = Productive Communication, by Wendy Warner
Acceptance Versus Comparison, by Wendy Warner
Not What, But How, by Cathy Kap
Can A Pandemic Bring About Positive Change?, by Wendy Warner
Parents: What Are You Sowing And Reaping?, by Wendy Warner
Are You Clothed In Kindness?, by Wendy Warner
Conflict Is So Hard At Times!, by Wendy Warner
Understanding Your Teen's Love Language, by Wendy Warner
Embracing Your Teen’s Journey to Independence, by Wendy Warner
Emotional Awareness is Key – Even for Children, by Tonya Ratliff
Please Listen To Me, Don't Dismiss Me, by Wendy Warner
Note to Parents: Just Be There, by Tonya Ratliff
Play… It’s Good for the Soul, by Wendy Warner
R.E.S.P.E.C.T. Find Out What It Means to Parenting, by Wendy Warner
What Every Child Needs a Little More Of…, by Wendy Warner
Stop the Bully: How to Empower Your Child, by Deb Toering
Stop The Bully: How To Empower Your Child [VIDEO], by Deb Toering
Letting Go, by Deb Toering
The Importance of Positive Moments for a Child, by Wendy Warner
Surviving in a House of Chaos: Take Back Control With Effective Parenting, by Tonya Ratliff
Surviving in a House of Chaos: Implementing Structure, by Tonya Ratliff
Surviving in a House of Chaos: Maintaining Consistency, by Tonya Ratliff
Surviving in a House of Chaos: Managing Expectations, by Tonya Ratliff
Surviving in a House of Chaos: Take Back Control [VIDEO], by Tonya Ratliff

Changing Your Parenting Blueprint

8/16/2022

 
by Kathy Cap, LLC, NCC​
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Kathy Cap is a Limited Licensed Counselor (LLC) in private practice at Trinity Family Counseling Center. She is a graduate of Oakland University with a Masters in Counseling and joins Trinity after a number of years in a solo practice. Kathy enjoys working with couples, and adults of all ages, including those older adults facing an array of life transitions related to health changes, loss, and caregiving.
There you are, looking down at your sweet little baby, counting their tiny fingers and toes.  Wrapped up in that tiny bundle are all of your hopes and dreams for their bright and happy future. You make a promise to love them unconditionally and protect them from harm. You have every intention of being the most loving, kind, and patient parent. However, even the most well-intentioned person can find themselves struggling.

Let's face it, not everyone is emotionally prepared for parenthood, and our past traumas can quickly sneak into our daily interactions with our children.  Maybe you were raised by parents who were very critical, easily angered, or not respectful of your feelings. You might have lived in a home where you were constantly compared to others, or the withholding of love and affection was a form of punishment. Your parents could have been very overprotective, anxious, or negative thinkers. These behaviors can have long-term effects, and can be unintentionally passed down to your kids.

It doesn’t have to be this way. You are not destined to become your parents. Seeking therapy can help you learn from your own past and break the negative cycle before it’s too late. Therapy is a great space to share your frustrations—and, trust me—there will be many, and to manage your expectations.  It’s a place to process your own emotions, fears, and hang-ups so they don’t become your children’s experiences as well.

Good and consistent parenting can be difficult. However, understanding your own triggers, learning how to set healthy boundaries, and how to communicate effectively can change the trajectory of the parent /child relationship and help them become well-adjusted adults.

It’s never too early to do this work. Just as premarital counseling helps you to understand your future partner better, pre-parental counseling can help you better understand your views on parenting and question the blueprint that has been passed down to you. Doing this work now will create a home environment where your children will feel safe, seen, and loved.

Children are a blessing. The assistance of a caring professional counselor with experience in parenting can go a long way in assuring that your child(ren) experience the very best version of who you are.

Copyright © 2022 Trinity Family Counseling LLC
  • Home
  • Areas of Specialization
    • Christian Counseling
    • Emotional Management
    • Self-Care
    • Relationships and Marriage
    • Grief and Loss
    • Family Counseling
    • Divorce
    • Remarriage and Blended Families
    • Parenting Counseling
    • Children and Adolescents Counseling
    • ADHD Counseling
    • Groups
  • Our Counselors
    • Tonya Ratliff
    • Deb Toering
    • Wendy Warner
    • Liza Hinchey
    • Dave Papandrea
    • Sherrie Darnell
    • Shelley Kruszewski
  • The Intern Option
  • LLC Supervision
  • Fees