You Could Have A Romantic Valentine’s Day

You Could Have A Romantic Valentine’s Day

As Valentine’s Day approaches, it’s tempting to think romance will materialize out of thin air like a box of dark chocolates.

However, if your relationship isn’t characterized as affectionate, romantic or even connected, don’t expect fireworks on February 14th. The truth is, real romance is a day-by-day effort. Have you heard the old saying, “…sex begins in the kitchen”? It could be expanded to say “…sex begins in the laundry room, the kid’s bathroom at bath time and in the kitchen doing the dishes…” The more each spouse feels cared for, supported and a part of a team, the more affection and romance can blossom.

Did you know there is research that says the more a couple engages in non-sexual touch, the better their sex life is? It makes sense though. If you frequently reach for your partner’s hand, easily greet one another with a kiss and snuggling is the norm, then you’re probably emotionally and physically connected. If the only time a wife receives a hug is when she gets ‘the look’, it’s not really romance. It’s more like an obligation than a mutually exciting idea.

Romance doesn’t have to be for movie stars and 20 somethings. It’s in the little things. Romance is learning his or her love language and then speaking it regularly. Not just on special events. Does she feel loved with affirming words? Leave her a hand written note telling her how much you appreciate all she does for the family. Does he crave quality time? Suggest an activity like his favorite donut shop on Saturday morning without the cell phones on. Does she feel loved through gifts? Bring her flowers on any day that’s not a holiday. If he feels loved through acts of service or touch, you could combine those with a back rub! The idea here is that you are looking for ways to show you care, you’re pursuing them in the way they feel most loved.

When you create a relationship atmosphere that’s creative, courteous and fun, it makes romance and intimacy just another extension of what’s already in the air.

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