Are Your Relationships Well Watered Or Wilting?

This spring, I purchased four new flowering shrubs. I envisioned blooms brightening my garden all summer long. However, it has been a hot and dry summer which hasn’t served my new shrubs well. I diligently watered them at first, went out of town and came back to intermittent watering. What I couldn’t see was how thirsty those poor roots were for more water than they were getting. As the first shrub started browning, I increased the watering schedule. Now all four are struggling to make it as I tend to them like a sick patient. Why am I telling you about my wilting shrubs?
 
Because the blooms of a well-watered garden are like the inner radiance of a well encouraged soul. How about that for an analogy? Just as I was looking forward to new flowers in my garden, we start a marriage or begin parenting anticipating all of the bright days ahead. We begin with good intentions and lots of “watering” of each other. At some point in relationships, people get a little thirsty to hear they are appreciated, to know they are loved. It is like fresh, cool water pouring over them giving them life. When our spouse hears more criticism than encouragement, they might start to wilt a bit. Our kids need daily doses of “plant food” to help them bloom. They need to know they are worth our time to play with them. They need grace when they make a mistake and encouragement it will go better next time. If your kids look like they are turning brown with anger, withdrawal or an antagonistic attitude, you might stop to think about the condition of their roots. Are they withering under a lack of affirmation? Are they thirsting to have someone listen to them without giving them advice?
 
We generally know our spouses well and when they are stressed out. We know the times when they could use a little Miracle Gro in their morning instead of dry neglect or harshness. What a difference it makes when we take the time to see their efforts, let them know they are loved and appreciated. What can you start doing to tend to your relationships to bring out the brightest smiles? The loudest laughter? The blooms of people who feel good about themselves? You don’t even need a watering can. Just speak life giving words of affirmation and encouragement.